Sweet Lullaby | Anya
Declan had been thinking a lot about anya and the baby recently. He’d though about the lullaby she wanted him to write for the baby and he wanted to write it; he just wasn’t sure if he could. He sighed and laid back on his bed, gazing at the ceiling. He had no inspiration and he couldn’t figure out why. Declan had always felt the music wherever he went. Without the coke, he couldn’t feel it anymore. He felt it though, when he was with anya…
Declan sat straight up on his bed. That was it; Anya was the music. She made him feel it and hear it in his soul. Anya was the key to his inspiration; she was his inspiration! He grabbed his notebook and his guitar and started to play a few notes. He hummed along with the few bars and nodded. He was pleased with the result of the epyphany. Declan wrote some words and music notes on his notebook pad. The words that he just wrote down came out of his mouth in a sing-song voice, filling his room with music as his fingers strummed the guitar strings.
By the end of this session, he’d written a full lullaby and had sang it a few times already memorizing it completely. He hoped that Anya liked it and even more hoped the baby would like it too. Declan looked at his guitar and then to the case. In the case, he’d tacked a photo of Anya from when they first met. He wasn’t sure why he’d done it when he put it in there but he knew now. He was in love with Anya; he had to tell her. He put his guitar in the case and made sure his notebook was next to it so he wouldn’t forget it.
He quickly got changed and grabbed his guitar and notebook. He wanted to show Anya the lullaby and hopefully tell her how he felt. He wasn’t sure how it would end up but hoped for the best. If she didn’t feel the same about him, at least she’d know where he stood. If she does, it will be complicated, this is true, but it would be better off if everything was out in the open and on the table for inspection.
He rushed out of his room and to Anya’s room, he hadn’t exactly grabbed his guitar and notebook quite right so once he got to Anya’s door, he dropped the notebook in the midst of knocking. While waiting for her to answer the door he sat his guitar down and crouched to pick up notebook and the scattered pieces of paper that had fallen out of it. While he was gathering the papers, he realized that she may not even be here. He cursed himself for not texting her or calling first before going over. He hoped that Owen wasn’t there either. He wasn’t sure which would be worse; anya not being there or owen being there with her. He took a deep breath hoping and praying that it was neither. He was still crouched as he heard shuffling behind the door and then the click of the door opening….
Anya felt like a cow. She couldn’t walk anywhere without waddling, and she was constantly having to change positions when she slept. The previous night’s sleep had left her exhausted, the baby deciding to tap dance across her stomach instead of sleeping. She picked up her book of baby names, dog-eared at certain favorite pages. She still couldn’t believe she was having a baby girl. The thought of having to deal with a girl who resembled anything like her mother’s behavior was nearly overwhelming. She knew she’d have her work cut out for her, but at least she’d have Owen to protect the girl from immature little boys. At least, she thought so… Sometimes, it was hard for Anya to think into the future. Owen had still shown how freaked out he was, and she wasn’t sure how things would work out. She was highlighting a few names when she heard the knock on the door. “Ugh…” Anya sighed, doing all but actually rolling to get off the bed and walk slowly to the door. “You better be Chinese take-out,” she called teasingly from behind the door before she opened it and saw Declan, crouched on the floor as he picked up his papers. She noticed his guitar propped near the side of the door. “I would help you pick that up, but I can’t promise I’ll be able to get up,” she said with a giggle as he rose to meet her gaze. “What’s with the guitar? Have you figured out a lullaby for your possible baby girl yet?” she said with a smirk.
Declan sighed. He knew she’d caught his shakes. “Too many.” He tool a deep breath. He knew she knew what he felt like. He knew she was there for him and he hoped she knew he was there for her too. “I always told you you should stay sober anyway.” He grinned at her mischieviously.
“Mmmmhmmm…that turned out to be good advice, seeing as I got pregnant. Sometimes I think about what it would have been like if I was…I would never forgive myself,” she said firmly, biting her lip. “I know it feels like an eternity, but keep at it, Dec. You don’t need that mess weighing you down again. Believe me, I know.”
(Source: anya-macph)
text @ anya
- Dex: you're right.... so what happens with us?
- Anya: What do you mean, Dec? I'll still see you all the time.
- Dex: not if you're not hereeee
- Anya: I'll still be at the house, silly. Just not sleeping here. I'll visit all the time!
- Dex: good. Otherwise who else would put up with my shit???
- Anya: No one, sir. No one ;)
text @ anya
- Dex: you're right.... so what happens with us?
- Anya: What do you mean, Dec? I'll still see you all the time.
- Dex: not if you're not hereeee
- Anya: I'll still be at the house, silly. Just not sleeping here. I'll visit all the time!
Declan wasn’t sure of what to say really. He was having problems with sobriety and didn’t wanna burden her. “Usually I can just play and work out a song. I just don’t know if I have it in me.”he looked at his hands and saw they were shaking. He quickly sat on them. “How have you been?”
Anya noticed Declan looking down at his hands. She noticed they were shaking, and it clued her into what Declan was experiencing. Withdrawal was a bitch. She remembered all too well. “How many days has it been?” she asked, her eyes locked on his. When he asked how she had been, she shrugged her shoulders. “Considering I’m knocked up and can’t drink away my problems anymore, I’d say I’m doing okay. I don’t know…things are…complicated,” she noted, not quite sure how to use her words.
(Source: anya-macph)
text @ anya
- Dex: you're right.... so what happens with us?
- Anya: What do you mean, Dec? I'll still see you all the time.
text @ anya
- Dex: you're moving out??
- Anya: I...I don't know yet. Owen is looking at apartments. He said he's just been thinking about it some.
- Dex: yeah I see that..... and what about the house? The show?
- Anya: I guess this is the sucky part where I have to think about what's best for the baby. Like Owen said, I can't really raise a child in a party house, you know?
Looking at Apartments to rent.
Well… I will come and get you in a bit. Bring an overnight bag.
Overnight bag? Okayyy!
Looking at Apartments to rent.
Well… I don’t know. We could go out or stay in… your choice.
Let’s go out. I need to get out for a while anyway. I’ll let you make the plans ;)
text @ anya
- Dex: you're moving out??
- Anya: I...I don't know yet. Owen is looking at apartments. He said he's just been thinking about it some.
